Megas XLR

Megas XLR is a show about a fatass named Coop, his douche friend Jamie, another one of those "Super hot!" cartoon chicks and some dude named Goat. The show also had giant robots. Yep. Not much else to be said here so I'll just move on to the weapons Coop's robot had (This is actually all going to be taken from Wikipedia because I'm too lazy to type all of that out.

Megas' Weapons

 * Time Drive (first appeared in "Test Drive") - Megas has the ability to travel through time (originally installed by Kiva in the 31st century). The time-flux control unit was smashed by Coop, rendering the Time Drive inoperative.
 * Eight-Ball Fireball (first appeared in "Test Drive") - Megas makes the signature move of Ryu from Street Fighter and projects a Hadoken-like fireball that resembles a billiard 8-Ball.
 * The Jammer (first appeared in "Battle Royale") – A weapons-grade karaoke system that, when teamed with Coop's (very) off-key singing, is capable of generating a wave of sonic destruction capable of annihilating a space station.
 * Super-Destructor Mode (first appeared in "S-Force S.O.S.") – A mode that covers Megas from head to toe in missile launchers. However, Coop has yet to debug the targeting system, making the mode more dangerous to friend than foe.
 * Mazer Refractor (first appeared in "Universal Controller") – Fires a beam that creates an invincible, deflecting force field around whatever it hits (although weapons that are inside the shield can still be shot out). The usefulness of such a device is questionable. If the polarity is reversed, the shield that lets everything in and nothing out.
 * That Cool Giant Energy Sword Thing (first appeared in "Battle Royale") – The hands of Megas can create a huge energy sword in a manner similar to that of Voltron.
 * Cool Blade Thingy (first appeared in "Junk in the Trunk") – Blades surround Megas's entire body. Spinning blades have also appeared.
 * Nitrous (first appeared in "The Fat and the Furious") – A mode that accelerates Megas's speed a thousand times, enabling it to move at lightning-like speed.
 * Manual Overdrive (first appeared in "The Fat and the Furious") – A Dance Dance Revolution-style system used as a back-up when the automatic driving gears fail. Coop dances, and Megas mimics Coop's exact movements, though the other weapons are off-line. Despite the silliness of the system, this can actually be very handy for use in combat, if Coop was in better shape.
 * Headlight Lasers (first appeared in Dude, Where's my Head?) - The headlights of the car that forms Megas' head project lasers that can be increased by using the Hi-Beam option.
 * 5 Minutes Till End of Episode (first appeared in "Coop D'Etat") – This activates something that allows Megas to overcome whatever odds Coop got into.
 * The Do Not Touch Button (first appeared in Viva Las Megas) - This launches multiple nuclear warheads. Fortunately, Kiva is able to keep Coop from actually using it. Coop then replies "What's the point of having Nukes if you can't use them?"
 * Big Red Button of Irony (debut in Ice Ice MEGAS) involves using the enemy's own beam of destruction against them, it doomed two entire species directly and indirectly
 * Bet You Can't Guess What This Button Does (debut in Driver's Seat) - This is the ejector seat for the passenger side, which Coop uses to launch Gorrath into the air. He was surprised that it actually worked and stated "And who says my modifications backfire?"
 * Light Gun (debut in Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Coop) - Pulling the gun out of the holster causes Megas to retract its right hand, forming a blaster. The blasts are powerful, but you have to 'reload' it after eight shots, by pointing down at the reload monitor and pulling the trigger.
 * Custom Horn (appeared in Space Booty) - A large horn that plays 'La Cucaracha,' which can also enrage space dragons.
 * Save the World Button (debut in Driver's Seat) - Amazingly, Coop came up with something to actually save the world. Too bad it was out of order at the time. He also had buttons labeled Destroy the World, Smite the World, and Destroy the World Worse.
 * Heater Flamethrower (debut in Universal Controller) - By moving the heater controls from Warm, to Hot, to Dang, Megas' arms come together, the hands retract, and an enormous blast of searing flames is shot out. The combination of both of Megas' hands into a single projectile weapon is similar to stock animation used it Voltes V.
 * Special Move Controls (debut in All I Wanted was a Slushie) - Due to his love for smashing, Coop had installed various controls which make Megas do all sorts of physical violence. These include Head Butt, Ripping Arms Out of Sockets, General Pummeling, Pounding and More Pounding.
 * This better then (first appeared in "Junk in the Trunk") - twin axes sprout from Megas arms, which can also be launched.
 * Robot Integration System (first appeared in "The Bad Guy") - Megas acquires the ability to integrate parts from other robots onto his own armor making it stronger. Coop did this with the parts of the S-Force making his mech stronger which he used to defeat Ender. Of course, this wrecked the S-Force mechs in the process.
 * Ice Blaster (First appeared in "Thanksgiving Throwdown") - The center of Megas's chest retracts and pulls out a giant laser. It blasts the enemy, freezing it from the feet to the head. Punching the target then shatters it.
 * Destroy Moth-Like Bug and Anti-Cocoon buttons (first appeared in "Bugging the System") - these were two choices in which Coop had in order to destroy the 'Mothra' wannabe. He ended up choosing something else.
 * Phoenix Explosion (first appeared in Bugging the System") - This move was a totally accidental move which Coop used to destroy all the bugs in the Ring World. Megas becomes enveloped in a firebird-shaped corona of flames.
 * Missiles, More Missiles and ALL DA MISSILES buttons (first appeared in "TV Dinner") - when fighting a planet-sized monster, Coop used all three of these buttons to fire all of Megas' missles.
 * Active Camouflage (first appeared in "Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Coop") - Megas has the ability to become camouflaged. When Coop tried it to hide from the Glorft on the moon, Megas went through several camouflages. But none of them worked out the way it should.
 * Dimensional Hole Generator (first appeared in "All I Wanted Was a Slushie") - Similar to the S-Force's Omicron 13, a beam is shot out from Megas' chest, creating a temporary rift in the space-time continuum. Unfortunately, it sucked up the convenience store where Coop wanted to buy a Mega-Slush.
 * Teleporter (first appeared in The Driver's Seat) - Coop installed a device which allows him to teleport objects and people over great distances, even to places out in space. However, he has virtually no control over what or WHO gets teleported, nor the destination point. Mishaps such as transporting himself onto the Gloft Mothership or his Big Glug into the Gloft's Control Center has happened.
 * Universal Controller (first appeared in Universal Controller) - Coop designed a controller which will control every device in his home, (VCR, DVD, TV, etc). However, when it's hooked up to Megas, it will override virtually EVERY TV screen and monitor in Jersey. It was stolen by Skalgar due to a gross misunderstanding and was presumed destroyed along with him.
 * Atomic Disrupter Cannon (first appeared in "Dude, Where's My Head?") - an extremely powerful beam is shot out from Megas' chest, which can burn through virtually anything. Jamie accidentally activated it when he tried to run away.
 * Shields (first appeared in "The Driver's Seat") - though the button may sound impressive, activating it only causes the car to put its top up.

Holy balls
Those Wikipedians sure have a lot of time on their hands. Just look at that shit up there. That's at least 70 sentences long. That would take around 13 hours of television watching just to see every episode and record every single new weapon. Thirteen hours of watching television and taking the time to type all of that, bolden all the names, link parts of it and telling us what episode it first appeared in. The show only had two seasons too. Why would anyone go to this length for a show that lasted a year? Damn Wikipedians, gathering all that useless knowledge and not having any fun with it. I should kick them in the balls for having the audacity to write a list this long.

Fun Fact: This is the longest article on the Unstoppable Hank Wiki and I only wrote the above paragraph and the introduction. Boo-ya.